English Pro Blog

Fringe funnies

Mon, 23 Aug 2010 06:42:47 GMT

This summer’s Fringe Festival spawned a plethora of funnies: here are the best of them according to the judges. Which do you like most? Did you hear a better one?

While Tim Vine’s *is* funny, my personal fav on this list is Gary Delaney’s at number 5.

1) Tim Vine "I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again."

2) David Gibson "I'm currently dating a couple of anorexics. Two birds, one stone."

3) Emo Philips "I picked up a hitch hiker. You've got to when you hit them."

4) Jack Whitehall "I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands when they first came out. I say 'bought', I actually stole it off a short, fat ginger kid."

5) Gary Delaney "As a kid I was made to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog."

6) John Bishop "Being an England supporter is like being the over-optimistic parents of the fat kid on sports day."

7) Bo Burnham "What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names."

8) Gary Delaney "Dave drowned. So at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt. Well, it's what he would have wanted."

9) Robert White "For Vanessa Feltz, life is like a box of chocolates: Empty."

10) Gareth Richards "Wooden spoons are great. You can either use them to prepare food. Or, if you can't be bothered with that, just write a number on one and walk into a pub…"

And what about the worst? I think they’re as funny as the best.

Sara Pascoe "Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side."

Sean Hughes "You know city-centre beat officers... Well are they police who rap?"

John Luke Roberts "I made a Battenberg where the two colours ran alongside each other. I called it apartheid sponge."

Emo Phillips "I like to play chess with bald men in the park although it's hard to find 32 of them."

Bec Hill "Some of my best friends are vegan. They were going to come today but they didn't have the energy to climb up the stairs."

Dan Antopolski "How many Spaniards does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan."

Man Booker Dozen

Thu, 29 Jul 2010 08:10:22 GMT

Preparing for my MA and for teaching advanced writing and creative writing (prose) from October I have been bathing in a pool of books this summer, which is something of a dream come true.

Yesterday the longlist for the Man Booker Prize for Fiction was released, giving me a plethora of books to enjoy in the coming weeks.

Did you know Virginia Woolf read a book a day when she wasn’t writing? That’s awesome. As I read I focussing not only on the structure and approaches used by the writer to achieve his or her story, but I’m working on picking up my reading speed again – now that reading is less for absolute pleasure and more for improvement the more I read the better. After all, what is a writer that doesn’t read?!

Here is the list – I’d love to have your recommendations if you’ve read any of these.

Peter Carey Parrot and Oliver in America (Faber and Faber)

Emma Donoghue Room (Pan MacMillan - Picador)

Helen Dunmore The Betrayal (Penguin - Fig Tree)

Damon Galgut In a Strange Room (Grove Atlantic - Atlantic Books)

Howard Jacobson The Finkler Question (Bloomsbury)

Andrea Levy The Long Song (Headline Publishing Group - Headline Review)

Tom McCarthy C (Random House - Jonathan Cape)

David Mitchell The Thousand Autumns of Zacob de Zoet (Hodder & Stoughton - Sceptre)

Lisa Moore February (Random House - Chatto & Windus)

Paul Murray Skippy Dies (Penguin - Hamish Hamilton)

Rose Tremain Trespass (Random House - Chatto & Windus)

Christos Tsiolkas The Slap (Grove Atlantic - Tuskar Rock)

Alan Warner The Stars in the Bright Sky (Random House - Jonathan Cape)

Technorati Tags: Man Booker Prize,longlist,Virginia Woolf,books,writing,writer,reading,reader

Information Architecture begins

Tue, 13 Jul 2010 22:21:03 GMT

Squidoo tells me that “Information architecture brings together how people think with how systems work. It's a strategy and a discipline.”

This sounds great … if somewhat vague.

Webmonkey adds that “Information architecture is the science of figuring out what you want your site to do and then constructing a blueprint before you dive in and put the thing together.”

I want to know more about from a copy-writer’s point of view – I want to know what my writing role is in this discipline … this blueprint.

Of course, the guys that are most obviously involved in information architecture initially are the ‘techies’ – the ones who do things no-one else has the foggiest idea about. While the site needs to please the eye and actually work, the writing is what will actually do the job further down the line.

It seems to me that the questions being asked by the techie should also make it to the writer’s to-do list and should be answered in terms of building a ‘back-story’, if you will, for the written copy.

define the business’s mission
learn about the business’s brand
identify the goals of the website
define the audience
know exactly why people are going to visit the site

Well, now how is that any different to any marketing/website you produce? It’s not, but taking a while to consider these things properly could make writing a lot easier.

Webmonkey advises talking to everyone in the business from the top, down; writing down all the answers to distil into lists that should then be approved by the business before you get writing the copy.

Leaving the ‘audience’ responses till later, responses from the other bullet points should be rephrased into a set of goals, to be circulated and ranked into order of importance by the people involved in the business.

The ranked goals provide a set of clearly defined goals that will help enormously when it comes to writing (as well, of course, to designing and programming for the rest of the site team!).

Hmm, I think I’m going to enjoy information architecture – I’m a little worried by how obsessed I could get by it! I’m really looking forward to finding out about word tracking a little down the line – apparently users’ reactions change dramatically simply by writing a different word or phrase in a certain place (often the call to action). That’s probably a long way down the line … baby steps!

Technorati Tags: information architecture,writing,copy,webcopy,business,website resources,goals,Lucy Cripps.

Great Resources

Thu, 01 Jul 2010 04:53:10 GMT

With my Linked:HR moderator hat on I was asked for a list of my favourite website resources, so I thought I should share them with you too.

When I am writing, proofreading or copy-editing these are the places I turn to, as well as my own library of ‘real life’ books, to make sure I’m on the mark.

If you want to improve your writing skills, aside from using English Pro’s forum, these are excellent places to start:

Common mistakes explained: http://www.dailywritingtips.com/

Writing guidance for copy-writers http://www.copyblogger.com/

Masses of information about writing http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/681/01/

Easy guide to punctuation: http://www.informatics.sussex.ac.uk/department/docs/punctuation/node00.html

And if you’re still learning English, these guys have some fabulous, interactive games: http://www.englishgrammarsecrets.com/index.html

Technorati Tags: writing,proofreading,copy-editing,books,website resources,punctuation,common mistakes,writing guidance for copy-writers,learning English,Lucy Cripps

Information Architect?!

Mon, 28 Jun 2010 18:46:36 GMT

There’s a new kid on the block and I’d quite like to get to know him.

Writers Are Out

Once upon a time there were writers, then web-copy-writers and SEO experts. They’re living happily ever after somewhere - they’re out, apparently. Information architects are in.

Information Architecture

A riveting conversation with a graphic design friend of mine, Mike Carrick, opened my eyes to this brave new world. He described a cyberworld in which the designer, writer and programmer work as one to produce a website in harmony.

Bliggedy Blog

This sounds like something I want to know a LOT more about, and something I’d hope to use to bring value to my English Pro clients in the coming months in a series of research blogs. The ethereal ‘they’ are always saying that blogs are about information, about informally sharing knowledge while building a readership, a readership in a niche.

Nice Niche

Niches in writing are somewhat flooded, but it seems, on a first quick squizz that there is very little written to help we lowly copy-writers find our way through IA, and I, for one, want to know more. A lot more.

Master of IA?

Initially I’d been planning on writing my master thesis on international punctuation variation (oi – wake up!!), but this sounds like a far more fascinating and ultimately far more useful study.

Although I don’t start officially start studying for my master’s until January, I find myself itching to get started on this. As I read, build an understanding – and hopefully ‘master’ it in the coming months, I shall share choice bits with anyone who wants to read along,

Jump In

If you have any useful titbits you’d like to share jump on in :)

Technorati Tags: information architecture,information architect,writers,punctuation,master's,thesis,niche,blog,designer,writer,website,copy-writer,English Pro

Walk Away And Improve Your Writing

Sun, 27 Jun 2010 13:19:34 GMT

Finally the secret to improving writing has been revealed. What would you say it is?

Add more figurative language? Use ‘bigger’ words? Do more research? Write more? Write less? Cram in more keywords?

Nope, none of those!

It’s generally accepted that, for online purposes, less is more; that careful word choice is critical; and that aptly placed keywords help those frantic little search bots crawl their busy way through your writing.

But all of that is not even close in importance next to copybloggers’ secret.

In his blog, Larry Brooks claims that it doesn’t matter who you are, what you do, how you write, or how hard you to try prove this wrong – you won’t!

The Rule of 24 is simple, easy to implement and only has one minor downside (that I can see!).

Quite simply, leave whatever it is you have written for 24 hours. Write your little heart out then walk away, turn your back, and ignore it for a full day. Whether you’ve written a report, a novel, a poem, a post or a blog, Brooks tells us to leave it 24 hours before letting anyone see it.

And therein lays the only teeny-tiny downside that I can see … patience! To leave this now for 24 hours will drive me nuts!

Can I do it?

Brooks’ claim that everything is better after 24 hours it absolutely just, in my opinion, but can it fit into our fast-paced world where everyone expects everything to be done now, today ... yesterday!?

Technorati Tags: English Pro,writing,improve writing,keywords,24 hours,Larry Brooks,Lucy Cripps. word choice,write,Rule of 24,written

Just a FYI - "favourite" is spelled "favorite" without the "u".

Thu, 22 Apr 2010 20:58:05 GMT

Would you believe this is exactly what was sent to me in an email last week!? After I finished chuckling to myself I considered the seriousness of the situation. The person who sent this to me did so in all good faith, trying to help me to save face in a writers’ forum; nonetheless the mail struck a chord with me and I wanted to share.

I’ve always assumed that everyone knows at some level that there are differences between US and British English; it’s easy to forgive the less common ones, like the swapped-round quotation marks and inverted commas, or like using a colon after the salutation in a business letter and not a comma, but surely everyone is aware that the British spell words with a ‘u’ where the Americans don’t. Apparently not.

This ‘lost in translation’ thing the US and British speakers and writers have going is quite remarkable (hence I’m remarking on it!). For my MA thesis I’m planning on researching and learning the differences between spelling, grammar and punctuation not just in the US and the UK, but casting a wider net and trying to pin down common usage in international English writing and compiling it. Whether anyone would find it useful I don’t know, but it would certainly sate my curiosity and make me feel confident in writing British, American, Canadian, Indian, African and Australasian.

I wonder what other gems are out there: do you have any to share?

Technorati Tags: writing,Lucy Cripps,spelling,grammar,punctuation,British,US,UK,translation,lost in translation,writers' forum,business letter,comma,colon,spell

Bring It On!

Wed, 14 Apr 2010 11:32:48 GMT

Would you believe it!? The amount of work right now is astonishing. I’m thoroughly enjoying writing for www.cleanerlondon.com today, and I’m learning all sorts of tips and tricks about cleaning to pass onto their readers. My knowledge of the public’s perceptions of nuclear power has deepened after copy-editing a college paper, and I’ve been helping a teacher plan her English lessons.

Monday was my first day back in the classroom – at Salzburg University of Applied Sciences; it felt no different than any regular Monday morning back in the day. My suit still fitted and my board pens still worked! I’m rather looking forward to getting back there on Thursday afternoon. First lesson for all four groups is ‘Advertising’ and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed using the classroom projector and computer to present PowerPoint presentations and getting the classes speaking as much as possible.

Proofread a friend’s fable as well, which was very interesting and threw up a question about serial/Oxford commas. In the US, it turns out, using a serial comma (a comma before grammatical conjunction like and, or before the last part of a list) is perfectly acceptable – even expected, but in British English it really is something of a no-no.

Something that has been bothering me a bit recently is the use of a comma before ‘but’; there seems to be such inconsistency in literature that I’ve been hunting around in order to make my own mind up – once and for all … at least I can be consistent! As with anything there are always exceptions to the rules, but it seems that there should always be a comma before a but, or, yet or while when what follows it is a complete contradicting clause.

Helping my children to read and write is a pure pleasure. My son is now able to write his own name and can recognise the alphabet sounds, while my daughter is working on it!

We’re all living and learning!

Technorati Tags: proofreading,copy-editing,learning,writing,serial comma,comma,lucy Cripps,cleanerlondon,university,teaching

Glorious

Tue, 06 Apr 2010 13:49:12 GMT

What an astonishingly beautiful day. Life here is good!

Ironically a couple of weeks ago I hit the lowest point I’d been with English Pro. Having had problems with a previous employer claiming I have to wait five years before I have a business similar to theirs (globally!) I’ve pulled the website in its original ‘online’ form to avoid vile legal wrangling. My aim is not to upset, but to make a living proofreading, copy-editing and writing for anyone who needs a pen. Happily I’ve not been busier.

Over the last couple of weeks, amusingly I’ve had more work and interest in my services than I had in the previous few months; months through which I hauled myself trying to learn areas of business I’d barely considered before: marketing, sales (ewk!) and finance.

I am now able to concentrate on what I am good at, and enjoy, and am losing myself in proofreading books (I just took delivery of Butcher’s Copy-editing and Critchley’s The Pocket Book of Proofreading) and relaxing into a daily routine of writing and proofreading. Bliss!

Now we’re ‘after Easter’ I am waiting for the call to action from the course tutor on the MA Professional Writing at Falmouth College University so I can have my interview to start in January. For years I’ve wanted to do an MA (does one ‘do’, ‘take’ or ‘read’ a Master’s?) but never managed to find a subject that appealed. Creative Writing is all well and good, but it’s quite restrictive if one wants to branch out into other areas of writing. I have everything crossed so I am accepted!

Technorati Tags: Lucy Cripps,proofreading,copy-editing,writing,MA

A Write Treat

Tue, 30 Mar 2010 19:40:53 GMT

This last month I’ve treated myself to some dedicated *me* time – some time to write for the pure pleasure of writing. Most of my time is spent putting my lipstick on other people’s word-collars, leaving perfume on their punctuation-pillows and generally playing around with other people’s texts. While my brain wishes longingly to just roam freely across its landscapes, creating for itself, I can rarely allow it such liberty.

Two purposes meant that my creativity was allowed out to play: firstly my application to do an MA in professional writing, for which I have my interview after Easter; and secondly a kind request to ‘guest blog’ for my online friend Mel Menzies.

Following her recently published and increasingly popular semi-autobiographical novel ‘A Painful Post Mortem’, she has been keen to support her readers with information and access to help in order to avoid the tragic events in novel from once again becoming a painful reality. I can only hope that my recollections are of benefit to someone.

What I enjoyed most was luxuriating again in the glorious process of writing. The ummings and ahhings at the start, and the blank page that stares in anticipation as you fiddle around with those first little words.The black eeking its way across the screen as brain and fingers get into sync. Watching as the words gather themselves into a structure and thread their slow and methodical way into a completed piece of writing.

Of course it takes days to get there (on short pieces of writing like these!): revisiting, rereading, reading backwards, forwards and inside-out until each word does what you want it to. But what a wonderful process!

I’ve learnt to enjoy writers’ block; I know that it’ll shift eventually. The brain is a fantastic organ that, left to its own devices and not cajoled into an immediate answer, will present the writer with exactly what he or she needs.

Sometimes I wonder if the chaps at Nike weren’t talking to writers, not athletes, when they told us to ‘Just Do It’!

Here’s to the next chance I get to write for pleasure :)

Technorati Tags: A Painful Post Mortem,Mel Menzies,MA application,writing,writers block